Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Yachtiness

Posts tagged “Frankie Delgado

Twitterbag of the Week

Twitter is an amazing tool that has taken over the world of social networking. While it can be a legit tool used to keep in touch with friends and update people on the latest happenings, there are alway the shameless self-promoters who use it strictly to jack off to themselves and try and become famous (if they aren’t already). I never cease to be amazed at the DOUCHEBAGGERY of some people on this site. So, as party of my newy created blog, every week I will single out a new Twitterbag and cite some of their “tweets”, and subsequently rip on them.

Ladies and Gents, this should be fun, let the ripping begin.


I’m going to start off by asking you fuckers how the fuck this fucker got 50K followers. I know at least 4 of my pubic hairs that are cooler than this dude.

I’ll admit, I have watched The Hills, thus, I have the utmost credibility in ripping on this guido fuck. If you have heard him speak on The Hills, then you might feel bad for him because he talks like he’s mentally retarded, but don’t let him fool you, he’s a club promoter! I think he majored in club promotion at Harvard or Stanford, I’m not sure which one though. Wait nevermind, he’s just a douchebag that happens to hang out with other retards, and those autistic fucks happen to have a tv show. Please look at that grin, if that doesn’t scream “I suck cock”, I don’t know what does.

Lets translate a few of his tweets:
“I’m gonna go cut my hair ! New style ! 4 days til my bday !”
What he really means:
“I’m going to go to my stylist, Perez Hilton recommended him to me, and he is going to try to squegee out the narsty Guido goop from my head so I can have a chance at picking up my famous friends sloppy seconds at my own birthday party.”

Another tweet:
“Omg just felt the narliest earthquake at the movie theater at the grove.”
What he really means:
“Omg these vibrating seats with built in dildos at the new gay porn theater in Boys Town rule!”